I am a nice person. Given the choice between brutal honesty and a half truth that would spare another hurt and shame, I would pick the latter. I cannot stand malicious people and I believe kindness is key.
Having said that, I realise that it may be time for a change. People have a tendency to misuse the kindness of others, but more urgently, fending off unwanted fellows has become a Herculean task. Some amongst us are unable to distinguish between a polite "no thank you" and playing hard to get. This is what I would like to say to all those undesirable chaps out there. Those who insist and persist in an attempt to convince women who do not want them to change their minds. This is to you.
1. I dont want you. I feel no attraction. It's my right.
2. So we had a long chat at the bash last week. It was about ODM, Genge music and Obama. It's called small talk. How does that mean I want you?
3. The next time you join me on the dance floor, resist the urge to grab me or grind. Don't even touch me. Maintain the 2 foot radious. Music, lights and the hearty laughter of merrymakers not withstanding, I still don't want you.
4. I don't want you to buy me a drink. You'll think I owe you and come to collect. In any case, water is good for the skin. Cheers!
5. Stop trying to bond with my brother. He hates your gutts.
6. Dont call me after 10pm. Ungodly hours are reserved for lovers and close relatives. Call at noon.
7. Dont ask me why I dont want you. It is none of your business and trust me, you dont want me to tell you.
8. Your boy is also hitting on me. Hard. I know you know. You probably talk about it. Just like you, I don't want him. Talk about that.
9. I know you're also hitting on my pals. We talk about it. By the way none of them wants you.
10. I refuse to use another man as the reason I do not want to be with you. So no,
(a) I do not have a boyfriend,
(b) I'm not getting over an ex-boyfriend.
I just don't want you.
9 comments:
Aiii! Tch tch, you just killed him.
Brilliant!
I know what I'll do: I'll print out this entry, laminate it, and carry it with me to every social gathering. Maybe I'll make several copies; that way I can give them out, wordlessly, to every clueless guy I come across.
Thank you.
Seems someone is ignoring the signs in front of him! This is a killer post!
@ KC, feel free. I wish I could tattoo my forehead with the words, "THIS IS A NO KIDDING ZONE!" That might deter some fellows I know.
TIHIHIHIHIHI....funny and true!!!
Loving your blog by the way!
Am with the kenyanchick will save the drama of having to tell maybe i can maek copies so that issue them in advance. I agree with not using another man as an excuse.
Asanteni sana.
@ Aco, some peeps cannot read signs. Lakini when told in lay man's language "bila!", why do some insist? So annoying.
uhungrey on the dance floor, and elsewhere is unacceptable and should be a crime punishable by death or castration in its literal form.all lurhing grinders be warned and maintain the 2 foot radius.
i think as mamas we need to start putting sharp objects in our back pockets,specifically a well sharpened steadler(is that the spelling?)pencil.
any takers????
You really malizaad the poor kimwana, pole kwake!
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