Yes. No. Maybe.

I enjoyed a cozy chat with my girls the other day, over mandazi and some good spiced coffee (Ethios and Somalis are onto to a good thing). One particular discussion I want to share. It was about first impressions and this was the conclusion.

There are three categories a man can fall under. Everytime we meet a man and exchange that initial "Hi, my name is ______", we place him in one of three boxes. YES, NO or MAYBE. This swift demarcation is mostly carried out subconsciously. I figure it is one of our basic animal instincts that has to do with the selection of the best possible mate. I could be wrong.

Anyway, the point I am trying to make is this. Women know, from the word go, whether or not they could ever be intimately involved with the man standing before them. Everything that happens after that either guarantees your stay in that initial box or books you a ticket into another. As new information comes in, it is processed as either important or irrelevant and changes to placement are made.

Now, passage from box NO to box YES is possible. Rare, but possible none the less. Factors that facilitate this type of transfer include primarily those of an economic nature, but also realisation of gross misjudgement or sometimes amnesia. Should a chap suspect their placement in box NO, and would describe themselves as broke or cannot name one person who likes them, moving on is recommended. This is not fair, but then again what is?

A chap's best bet, should he miss placement in box YES is box MAYBE. This one allows some room to maneuver. Gather up the troops. Formulate a game plan. Psych up. One has the time and opportunity to repair (should they choose to do so) and make a come back. One will remain in this box until they say, or do that thing that bumbs them up or down.

Box YES is a good box to be in. A woman who places a chap in this box has opened the door to vast possibilities. He is, as we like to say, NDANI!

N.B
Do not for a moment believe that being in box YES guarantees that anything will ever happen. Oh no! External forces are hard at work that may ensure otherwise. The wisdom, reasoning, prudence and plain old common sense of a woman may impose an embargo on such events. The honours is upon you, the box-ee, to impress upon her, the box-er, the pros of engaging you in further dialogue.

N.B.B
Be warned. As stated above, things you say, or do, could see your quick relegation (sometimes permanently) from this prime spot to a lesser box. Such things as spitting habits, public crotch scratching or pocession of miscellaneous oddities like drugs and firearms will require quick action. Enter box NEVER.